Jo Gumm's story

How birth children experience fostering

Family is important when it comes to fostering children. Jo Gumm has fostered eight children in 10 years and she says her birth sons, Frankie and Alfie, are a big help.

October is Sons and Daughters Month, which highlights the important role birth children play in fostering households.

Jo, who’s lived in Brent all her life, first got into fostering in 2012 when Brent council had a stall at a local school fete. “My eldest son Alfie was seven, and he said, Mum, you should do that. You'd love looking after babies and you're at home."

In the decade since, Jo, her partner, Ian, and their sons have welcomed many vulnerable children into their home. 
 

Jo says her sons have always been enthusiastic about their family fostering other children, but she’s always been very aware of how it could impact their lives. 

Any family considering fostering should include their children in the conversation. 

“It's a lot for them to take on,” Jo says. “I don't feel that birth children get enough credit when they're in a foster family. It's very hard to share your parents, your home, your toys, your holidays. They share everything with the foster children.”

It’s also difficult for her boys when foster children leave their home. “It's like them saying goodbye to a sibling all the time.” 

That’s why Jo appreciates the support Brent Foster gives her, providing play therapies and other activities to get them used to children moving in and out of their lives.

Frankie and Alfie enjoy sharing their home with foster brothers and sisters. "Having foster brothers and sisters is obviously different from your normal experience as a family,” Alfie says. “Welcoming someone who is not part of your immediate family into the house is a challenge. But ultimately you accept them as your siblings, as your family, and you have to show them love and acceptance.”

Jo says: "Over the 10 years, my children have thrived from it. It's taught them that not everyone is as lucky as they are. But at the same time, it's also taught them how to accept other children and the difficulties that other children do face and go through."